When you have a child with a chronic illness, you have to go through the steps of grief emotionally to handle the disease. But once you go through those and get through the initial emergency period, you can get complacent during long stretches of generally good health where the “chronic” doesn’t rear its ugly head. … Continue reading The Steps of Grief with Each Doctor Visit
I have three kids. I love the hell out of each and every one of them and wouldn’t trade a minute with them. But I had NO idea what I was getting into. When you are young and in love you think “I want a child that looks like him.” or “Maybe our children will… Continue reading What Every Person Who Wants a Kid Should Be Told.
Most everyone starts off on the “fighting pediatric cancer” journey with loads of friends and family. The second you say the word “cancer,” it’s like you are suddenly the host to the world’s largest love fest. You have friends you didn’t know you had and your family members all stand up and offer to help,… Continue reading Culling the Herd: How Relationships with Friends and Family Change When Your Child has Cancer.
Disclaimer: This is not a preaching moment for me to tell you that you have to or even that you should believe in a God or Goddess or Gods or have any faith at all. I believe in the freedom of religion, whatever that religion might be, and that includes the freedom to NOT have… Continue reading My Faith and My Daughter’s Cancer
I find myself thinking those words more often than not in the last few weeks. I’ve always been the bad@$$ in the herd. The black sheep with the bandana, playing the metal music and not bending to the judgement of others. I didn’t cry for anything, ever. I didn’t cry when I moved away from… Continue reading Please don’t think me weak.
You are a Pediatric Specialist. You work in an office attached to a hospital, and you are an expert in your field. You do amazing things. You know the liver, heart, lungs, bone marrow, and tiny tiny cancer cells better than anyone and you know how good you are. Us parents aren’t trying to discount… Continue reading Tips for Pediatric Specialists: Coping with the Tempermental Relationship You Have with Parents
My husband is a man of many colors, a renaissance man with many cloaks and many talents. He is humble and kind and doesn’t think much of himself, which is ridiculous, but I can hardly change him or how he sees himself after 14 years. Much like myself, his soul was marred by our daughter’s… Continue reading Homage to Chemo Dads
When I was in law school, I remember being in torts class and learning about “the eggshell plaintiff.” A plaintiff is a person who sues another person in court for injuries. The Eggshell plaintiff is the person who is injured by something you did, but their injuries are far worse than they would be in… Continue reading The Eggshell Child
Sophia Tempee was born with Langerhans Cell Histiocytosis ravaging her organs. She was 6 lbs 8 ounces, bouncing, beautiful, pink with no hair and HUGE dark eyes and no one had a clue, but she was sick. From birth, she puked nearly everything up all the time. I doubled up the formula in her bottles… Continue reading Don’t Say “She Looks Fine” to the Parent of a Sick Child.
Dear Pediatricians, First, let me start by thanking you. You have gone into an impossible field that forces you to see children in pain or dying, and yet you come to work every day and provide care and work towards solutions for children. You have to help demanding, angry, and scared parents, even when you… Continue reading Open Letter to Pediatric Physicians